WHAT FLESH-DEVOURING, MARROW-SUCKING, GUT-EVISCERATING, ALL-AROUND TERRIFYING MAGICAL CREATURE SHOULD YOU BE? Find out with this hair-raising quiz by Octonofilia Scamander, magizoology expert!
An interesting case of Splinching has come to our attention. Mr. Blickley, 43, was Apparating home on Saturday after working an extra shift. Unfortunately for him, lack of sleep and jealousy of his mates who went fishing without him made Mr. Blickley wish he was somewhere else.
His head has being fished out of the river by his best friend Mr. Johnson, who is now in being treated in St. Mungo’s alongside with Mr. Blickley.
The Quibbler reminds you: keep your head on straight during Apparition, or you might lose it!
The Quibbler recommends:
Levitation under the open sky helps with sleeplessness and back pain! Still using the Levitation Charm and waking up on the ground? Try the Floating Charm instead!
And don’t forget to let us know of the results.
GHOST SICKNESS OR MINISTRY’S NEW SECRET WEAPON?
For far too long they made us believe that what is dead cannot die again. And they were wrong! Our loyal subscriber, Mrs. Chandler, has informed us of terrifying news: her husband, deceased for almost a decade, is now on a deathbed all over again! “This is a nightmare!” Mrs. Chandler writes. “One morning, he just began melting! We sent an owl to St. Mungo’s, but they insist ghosts cannot get sick! What should we do?!”
The epidemics seems to be happening all over the place. At least three of our subscribers confirmed that they haven’t seen their family ghosts for over a week. Have they also melted away? And what is causing this horrible catastrophe?
“It has to be the Ministry!” Mrs. Chandler continues in her letter. “Kingsley Shacklebolt had promised to find a new way to guard Azkaban, and now he found one!” Mr. Shacklebolt, predictably, denies the accusations. “I have no intention to use ghosts as guards for Azkaban!” he informed our correspondent.
BUT DOES HE